This week the Indy’s annual Love & Sex Issue focuses on Missoula’s consent campaign.
How do you define affirmative consent?
Have you ever intervened in a situation you thought looked sketchy or coercive?
Tara Walrus: If you’re not OK with something, you should express that. And respect it if it’s expressed to you. Personal experience: I’ve certainly had to remove myself from situations because I thought it could have turned more threatening. It’s about expressing how you feel and what you are and aren’t OK with. Most of the time, it works.
Jonathan Pierce: I think that affirmation is a little seductively easy to try and define, because it boils down to yes or no. But it’s not always that easy. That’s why I think it’s good we’re having the conversation. Only in the abstract: I luckily haven’t really been forced to. I’ve definitely heard of friends being in situations where I would have intervened if I’d been there.
Alisha Arnsparger: I define consent as an enthusiastic agreement between two people. Preparing others: Personally, no. But I have been able to participate in a lot of bystander training, whether consent is compromised or not.
Seth Sivinski: You have to bring it up, say, “Is this OK?” If any party makes their intentions known, the other party has to respond. It should be a discussion, not an assumption. Stepping in: Yeah, actually. Both times at bars. Once there was almost a fight. The other time the guy asked me if she was my girlfriend. As if that should have mattered.
Elizabeth Poole: I feel it has to be mutual, and that’s not just with words but with body language, anything that does give the message that you don’t want that to happen. A plus and a minus: I actually haven’t really run into that situation, which is maybe good and bad at the same time. It would definitely be a significant memory in my mind.
Asked Tuesday afternoon at Clyde Coffee.